Kids' Shows Today Suck and here's why
My daughter who is almost 9 is obsessed with all things Disney Channel. It has become all she wants to ever watch. We're talking Austin and Ally, Shake it Up, Casey UnderCover, Liv and Maddie, Dog with a Blog, Girl Meets World. I've sat through all of them.
And they are basically the same show. They all involve pre-teens or teens. They all feature blended casts of males and females with easily identifiable tropes: the good guy, the sidekick, the geek, the heart throb the little bro/sis. They all have kids who have loud, I'm guessing pricey, colorful wardrobes. They all look like they have their hair and makeup professionally done every single episode. And the worst part of all: they all have a laugh track.
Most of these shows also have another element to them. None of the kids on these shows are regular kids. In the case of Austin and Ally, they are both singers and songwriters who perform per episode. Shake it up has another cast of singers. Dog with a Blog even has a girl on it who sings. In the case of Casey Undercover, the kid is a teen spy. Girl Meets World is the only one I can tell so far that is sort of down to Earth, but every commercial break has a singing Sabrina Carpenter (who is the Shawn of the show) belting out something, so it's probably only a matter of time before she sings on the show too.
Now it may seem like I'm picking on Disney. And I am. And maybe I would feel differently if I saw Disney channel shows in my era. But I didn't. We didn't have the Disney Channel. I grew up in the era where you actually had to pay for the service. Now it's bundled with 100's of other channels no person could possibly watch all of.
Back in my day (oh god, did I just say that?) I watched Nickelodeon. The 90's were a treasure trove of beloved Nick classics: Doug, Are you Afraid of the Dark, Space Cases, Hey Dude. All the best shows were on a lineup that would show every Saturday night: SNICK it was called. And you were nobody if you didn't catch the whole SNICK lineup and talked about it Monday morning. The pre-teen version of a watercooler show.
But my absolute favorite show back in the early 90's was Salute Your Shorts.
It was a show about 7 kids and their camp counselor getting into trouble and having a good ole summer. It wasn't shot in a shiny studio with perfectly matched and coordinated furniture. It was shot outside where half the show takes place, the other being inside a camp lodge and a bunch of cabins. Nothing fancy about those sets.
The characters don't wear perfectly matched colorful clothing. Most of the time you see them only wearing tshirts and shorts. They hardly wear any makeup (even the girls, gasp!). Heck, one of the characters is a ginger with a mullet!
The cast of Salute Your Shorts seem like normal kids. Kids who my kids would want to hang out with. In one episode alone, you hear the word "fart" twice! Can you imagine anyone on the Disney channel even admitting they have a butthole????
The reason kids show suck nowadays is the kids on these shows arent relatable. Not every kid in this world is going to grow up to be a popstar. Im making it my mission this weekend to show my kids shows that I grew up with. When kids were kids, not a Disney popstar that will inevitably be spit out and destroyed. Looking at you Miley Cyrus:
Who would you rather hang out with??
Teen models who are obviously airbrushed with perfect hair and makeup?
Or these kids: totally normal fun loving teens
I know my answer, I just hope my kids and future generations don't buy into the Disney hype.
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